Mad Movie Guy

Friends, Romans, Countrymen….lend me your eyes, For I have something to share, something that some of you will not like, something that many of you will not believe, something, so, something…Ill explain it…

My loyal wonderful fans, How are you all this morning?

First of all, lets get this out in the open, for those of you who have to see me today, I look like an asshole, don’t compliment me. I wont accept it, I look like an asshole, and if you tell me other wise, I’m gonna start acting like one.

Whew, I’m glad we have that out in the open, I feel better. First of all, before I get into my opinions on the NBA draft, I want to give some congrats to the OSU Baseball team, bringing home the National Championship, Thats a big deal. Thats way cool guys, way to go.

Ok My loving readers, any suggestions on how the fuck I can get my left eyelid to stop twitching all the time ?

Its been going on for two days and I’m starting to go mad.

Any thoughts would help… You are my Dr’s, My Nurses, and My E.R.

Cure me.

That is all

Well my adoring fans, and faithful readers, I promised a Movie Blog, so here it is.

In the past 24 some odd hours I’ve watched a few movies, and I figured you, the fans, would want to know how I feel about these movies, so you can decide if you would like to see it. Now I cant make up your mind for you, but I can provide simple guidelines that you should follow, because quite frankly, I know what the fuck I’m talking about.

Greet Street Hooligans.

Where is the worst place to run into a woman you find to be attractive ? The answer is when she’s the clerk at the porn shop. Pretty much pointless bothering at that point right ? Especially when you walk in with your porn obsessed roommate “Lumberjack Ross” and he Walks out with an armful of new titles ranging from “Spunk’d” to “Grudge Fuck 3: The Umpire Strikes Back” Put me in a sour mood, cause she was cool, had a nice little attitude on her, yet I walk into a porn shop at 3am with another dude, which I cant help but think instantly puts the “hmmm are they gay?” Question in her head. I’m also not gonna buy anything cause then In my head I’m thinking she’s gonna think I’m a dirt bag. Which I’m ok with not buying porn, because honestly, if you’ve seen one you’ve seen em all, they are obscenely overpriced, and if Noah Needed only one arc to carry two of each animal during the flood, Ross would need two arcs to carry all his porn. BUT THEN if I don’t buy a porn, I’m wondering if she’s gonna think that I’m gay still because, the crazy lumberjack just spend 86 bucks on straight porn, he’s not guy, wonder why the goofy looking bastard didn’t buy any, is he gay ? Or if there is something wrong with his gear? Either way, I’m screwed, well of course not literally, more so in the shitty situation I chose to find a woman attractive. So if any of you know the little blond that works at the Lancaster porn shop by the pink, send her my way. Cause the only chance I have to meet her is to never go back.